Update Time!

Okay, so it's been over a week since I have updated...wow I suck. Well I just wanted to come on here and say I am still doing well. I love myfitnesspal and the fact that I am counting calories. I love that I am accountable for EVERYthing I eat. Honestly I don't really miss WW that much. I felt like after a while I was "cheating" the system which is why I wasn't really losing weight for a bit. I mean I wasn't intentionally cheating the system...but I was doing it and I realize it now. As of this past Sunday I am now down 83.4 pounds. WOOT! I have been walking at least 4 days a week recently though it has been raining here a lot lately so it has been kinda of tough but I'm not letting that stop me. I really love just going for a walk...putting on Pandora and just clearing my head. I've had a lot of drama in my life recently and I do need that time. It really sucks that I have pretty much lost all of my weight loss support in my life...but I do have myfitnesspal. The people on there are really nice and I appreciate the feedback. No one has ever really commended me on my weight loss. I've lost over 80 pounds and you mean NO one has noticed? I mean geez, thanks. It's all good. I am not doing this for compliments...but it would be nice every now and then to hear. My husband did send me a random text the other day saying I was looking really good lately. It really did make my day. Today they are having food at work to celebrate a good sweeps period and I honestly just can't eat anything. I don't even want to go and put myself in that position to WANT to eat anything I see. I'm really not one for avoiding situations because of food as it isn't something I can do for the rest of my life...however Saturday night I am going out to dinner (my fav. restaurant...The Melting Pot) and I know I will be eating quite a bit there...so why do it twice in one week. That's not very smart. So for lunch today I have a huge yummy salad, watermelon and some yogurt. Yum! It's so hard being the "fat chick". No one really understands what it's like to have a constant inner battle with food. My fight is daily...hell hourly. And you know what? I'm fine with that. I am going to have to make a conscious effort to not over eat and to think about what I'm eating for the rest of my life...and it is what it is. I mean I have to be aware of how much money I spend...I have to be aware of a lot of things in life...so food is just another one. Well that's my LONG update. Until next time! -A
Birthday update: I FIT inside the car!!! I was soooo scared but I was able to fit in the go cart and it was awesome! I also didn't over eat tooo bad. I mean I DRANK more than anything. But it was cool I haven't had much to drink in forever so yay! It was a fabulous birthday. I must make plans to make my lovely husband's birthday AWESOME too!

It's my birthday! I'm so excited! I took the day off from work and my husband is already off today. I woke up this morning to a cute schedule of our events today which include go cart racing (nervous about this as I worry I may not fit in the car!), go have Italian ice (my fav), go to dinner then have martinis at my fav. place. My goal today is to not over do it and to keep my goals in mind. As of today my unofficial weight is 259 however my official weight was 260 on Sunday, which is my weigh in day. I woke up this morning early put on my workout clothes and headed out the door for a walk only to see it's raining! Yikes! So no walking for me today. I'm so disappointed. It rained yesterday too so I couldn't walk. I did walk inside this last night for 15 mins. with weights...hey it's better than nothing. Well that's my quick update. Happy Birthday To Me! -A

NSV

Okay so I really don't get to go out much. Yeah, that's pretty sad to say. But honestly my husband doesn't like to go out much...though he'll get mad if I say that. Anyway, so yesterday we ended up going to the movies. And for the first time that I can remember I didn't have to lift one of the arms on the side of me so I could sit comfortably. That's such a huge victory. I'm so proud of myself. I actually sat there for a good part of the movie with my legs crossed. Yay for NSV!! -A

So Yeah...It's Been a While

It has been many months and I just came back to check out my blog to see where I was last time I posted here. Last time I posted here I weighed 262.6. Funny thing is last weigh in I weighed 262.6. What are the odds?? I have stopped doing weight watchers and I am currently using myfitnesspal as a tool to help me lose weight. My journey over the past year has taken a lot of twist and turns but I am still here. I did gain some weight approximately 14 pounds, which is what I have lost so far with the help of myfitnesspal. When I first started WW last year I felt I had all the support in the world. I was going to meetings with a girlfriend my boyfriend was being supportive and my sister was being supportive. Now it's over a year later and my girlfriend dropped out because she got pregnant and has since had the baby and isn't caring much about losing weight anymore. My now husband doesn't do much as far as being supportive either. For a while he would cook things that were healthy that would help me out or would go walking with me...now....not at all. My sister has too many issues of her own to even worry about being supportive about my journey. So where does that leave me? I am on the journey alone. I make youtube videos but no one views them or comments. I have a facebook page geared toward weight loss and no one ever responds back. Though I only have 10 likes...but nope no one says a word back. So yeah it's just me on the journey. I actually started writing this entry because it's the 4th of July and I was trying to get my husband to do something active with me such as go to the mall and walk around or go to dave and busters and play some games...but he isn't interested. All he wants to do is go sit in theater in the dark for 2 hours. I don't know how I am going to stay on the road to weight loss alone...but I will do it. I am losing weight for myself, so I suppose I don't need support...though it would be nice. So I am just going to keep pushing and doing what I need to do. I am going to renew my journal and write here at least once a week so I can keep track of my journey better. Even if no one ever reads this...I will at least be able to go back and read these entries to help myself. -A

Update

Okay, so this past week wasn't that great. I didn't exercise not one fricking time. But previously I have been working out 3 days a week. I am also going to get back to that this week. I'm still doing what I should be doing. I just wanted to update. Not much to say. I am now down a total of 74.8 pounds. So no complaints here!

Checking In, Again

Okay so I went on vacation and for a week my eating went OK...not good...not bad...but OK. I didn't stick with WW totally, but I definitely didnt' go overboard as I typically do once I am on vacation. I also started to slack on exercise. Okay let's just say technically haven't been doing well. But I went to the meeting Sunday...I actually STAYED and listened and I am motivated to keep it going. I actually don't feel BAD about myself right now. I am dressing better...I actually purchased a pair of jeans from Lane Bryant yesterday (with a coupon...that damn store is tooooooo expensive) and I'm feeling awesome! Mind you I want to keep losing weight...but I don't HATE myself as I did when I weighed almost 70 pounds more.
I have always been a "big" girl...but now that I'm a less bigger girl...still big, but not as big...I'm happy. Well as happy as I can be. So I'm back to tracking my food and exercising. OH and a BIG NSV...so I woke up this morning at 6:30a as usual to work out and I'm usually in there alone...but this morning there was a guy in there working out. Instead of turning around (as I have done before due to embarrassment) I went in there and STILL worked out...YAY. That's huge for me! I was like...shoooot I woke up this early and no way in hell I'm going to turn around. Plus I needed to work out, period. I need to tone up...and keep losing weight. I'm super proud of myself. Yay. Well that's my update...I am feeling good and staying motivated!

Checking In...

Okay so this past Sunday I lost 1.2. I feel like saying "only" 1.2, but I know it all adds up the end. It's just kind of hard to keep that in mind when you lose 1.2. I am happy I did lose though rather than gain. I did lose 3 pounds last week, so I should have known this week wouldn't be awesome. I also went out to dinner to Texas Roadhouse (a steak place) last Monday, so I'm sure that didn't help. This week I have worked out 2 days so far. I had to take Monday and Tuesday off because my leg (non exercise pain) has been hurting. But I did get up this morning and worked out for 32 minutes. I burned 383 calories. Not bad though last time I burned 402 calories...but it's alright. I am just proud of myself for getting up at 6:30 am this morning to work out.

So yeah that's pretty much my update. I plan on working out Friday morning also. I am a bit concerned because next week I am going out of town from Tuesday to Friday. I plan on still working out...or at least walking on the beach in the mornings (woot! beach...here I come!). I also think I'll buy a dining out companion book at WW on Sunday just so I'll have more info. at my finger tips. I'll also be bringing lots of snacks and fruit. So I do have a game plan. Well guess I'm out! Until next time....

BTW...the picture associated with this post is 1 pound of fat. I posted this to show myself and remind myself that THIS is what I lost this week...actually a tad bit more. So never should I feel bad for losing "just a pound"...it's hard work! :)